Three days of suspension and the pages of a diary that tell of anger, humiliation, loneliness. Acts of bullying, perhaps perpetrated by those who were supposed to defend and protect. This is the new chapter in the tragedy of Paolo Mendicothe 14 year old from Santi Cosma e Damiano, who took his own life the day before school started, a few months ago. The head teacher of the institute she attended was in fact temporarily suspended
«Sanctioning the manager really seems like a shortcut to me» states the writer and teacher Marco Erba, «It seems a bit like a witch hunt to me and it really seems to me that there is a bit of the idea of putting one’s head in the sand, I look for a respiratory head and I show that I have given an exemplary punishment and I show that I have intervened on the problem”.
«In reality» he continues «the fact that it is of a more unprecedented dramatic nature does not require shortcuts, it requires a profound 360-degree educational reflection and it asks for the ability to put us all on the line. Because when it comes to such tragic things, there are two themes: one, teaching empathy, which is what I always say. and that we must all do using our subjects, not only to convey notions, but to make people understand how precious, unique and unrepeatable every human being is and how much happiness comes from the care we have towards others. We must all do this, we parents, educators, we teachers, in our daily actions testimony of how caring for others in the world is precious. That’s the thing, it’s one of the key elements in my opinion to prevent bullying. Empathy and the ability to care are the characteristics of human beings and therefore bullying belies this.”
Pure repression? «There is no need, it is clearly necessary to prevent those who want to do harm from doing so, but the discussion is much broaderas we always say to ourselves on the topic of youth violence, so one theme is certainly that instead of finding scapegoats, everyone in their role is committed to giving testimony of care and using the subject they teach as a teacher to tell this story.”
Then there is a second aspect that Erba sees in his profession as a teacher: «The fragility of kids who have a pain inside, unexpressed, terrible and are unable to see their beauty. This is a very common thing that I see every day at school. You don’t see your beauty and therefore, sometimes, you end up hurting yourself and – sometimes – unfortunately you end up hurting yourself. There is a need to look at these kids, to make them feel seento make them feel that we care about them, I repeat this too, each in their own role.”
Faced with such a tragic event that breaks your heart, what should you do? «Working on the self-esteem of the individual so that everyone discovers the masterpiece that they are and work on empathy so that everyone discovers that happiness is giving and caring for others. Exemplary punishments and repression are useless, they are propaganda and in fact they are very sad because I see them as a form of trivialization of what happened, it is a convenient shortcut. finding the culprit, now this is not the case, or the monster of the moment, then obviously it is not the case of the manager, but the tactic of the scapegoat is something that really does not solve the problems”.
