However, many of us have this reflex! Scientists are categorical…
Whether to keep a child occupied or to allow parents to take a breather, television, tablets and smartphones are often options considered. However, the recommendations of health professionals are strict: avoid screens before the age of 3, then from this age, introduce them sparingly at well-chosen times.
But, in reality, ideal guidelines clash with everyday life. Between nighttime awakenings, unexpected events, long journeys and arguments between siblings, it is sometimes difficult to resist the ease of a cartoon, a nursery rhyme or a colorful application. But be careful, specialists warn: there is a very specific situation where it is particularly harmful to resort to this digital distraction.
Indeed, if offering a screen seems to immediately solve a problem, experts agree that it creates more problems in the long term. Giving a screen can indeed instantly distract a child, but it relies on a distraction that prevents the child from developing their own emotional resources. This is why offering a cartoon to a child in crisis should be avoided. Emotional self-regulation, essential for learning to manage anger and frustration, requires time and support. “Giving a screen during a difficult moment prevents the child from learning to manage their emotions,” explains Veronika Konok, behavioral science researcher. According to a Canadian study, this reflex can even become counterproductive: the more a child receives a screen to calm a crisis, the more angry he is, and vice versa.
Thus, parents have a determining role to play in this context. Acknowledge the child’s emotion by giving them words, such as “I see you are angry”, helps to defuse tension. Furthermore, by offering him a space where he can express his feelings while being supported, you will help him understand that his emotions are normal and that he can manage them. Over time, this learning strengthens one’s ability to cope with emotional challenges. Of course, you will have to increase your energy and patience, but the result will be worth it.
