During adolescence, sudden mood swings are quite common, which has a way of destabilizing adults. Pediatrician Arnault Pfersdorff gives his advice to parents.
One day cheerful, the next irritable… During adolescence, many young people experience what specialists call emotional storms, which often leave adults helpless since they always arrive when we least expect them. . According to Dr. Arnault Pfersdorff, pediatrician-resuscitator and author of “Your Teenager: decipher them, motivate them, help them achieve their goals” (ed. Hatier), these mood swings have psychological causes (changes in tastes and interests, altered sleep, rejection of parental authority) and physiological causes linked in part to hormonal upheavals.
Despite what one may think, these emotional storms are a good thing for the adolescent, because over time, he “learns to know himself better, to assert himself, especially since he sees clearly that his behavior causes trouble, disappointment, even excessive reactions in the adult who, himself, does not know how to react or does not can’t understand the reaction” of his child, underlines the pediatrician in his work. Precisely, he also shares valuable advice for parents who recognize themselves in this situation. The first may seem trivial, and yet it is essential: let your teenager speak. “Show that you are interested in what he says or feels, this will limit emotional escalation,” says Dr Arnault Pfersdorff. Along the same lines, give him your support if you notice that something is bothering him, “earn their trust, without becoming intrusive in their private life”comments the expert.
Once contact has been made and trust more or less acquired, “do not hesitate to guide him, but with caution and patience”. The important thing here is “that he does not feel judged or dispossessed by what he experiences”. In this kind of situation, for example, you can tell him “I feel you are in difficulty, we can talk about it if you want. With our two experiences, it could help, what do you think?” This type of sentence generally opens the dialogue. In any case, avoid saying “I knew this before you, I will help you”, which is not always well received by teenagers, explains the specialist.
Finally, so that he can express himself or externalize his emotions, you can encourage him to start an artistic or manual activity: writing (diary, poem, etc.), plastic arts, DIY, making models, photography, drawing , etc. “What matters is that he builds his self-esteem correctly” so that he thrives, concludes the pediatrician. And if he persists in withdrawing himself, refusing to talk, you can always consult your doctor who will be able to direct you to the right specialist to help him.
