Why does a year of school seem to last forever for your child, but flies by like a blink for you? Rest assured, you’re not crazy: our brain has very specific mechanisms that explain why little ones grow (really) too quickly.
“They’re growing up too fast.” No parent on Earth has missed this universal, almost visceral feeling. You put away his clothes in size 3 years while you swear you brought him back from the maternity ward yesterday, you watch him enter high school while you still remember his first fall on a bike… No, you’re not crazy: this impression is scientifically proven. Mathematicians, philosophers, physicists, neuroscientists and psychologists from around the world have looked into this sensation common to almost all parents. The explanations are numerous, and they all come together.
First, there is the theory of proportionality. The work of biomathematics researcher Christian Yates, which builds on that of French philosopher Paul Janet, shows that our brain evaluates time by unconsciously comparing it to the length of our lives. Thus, for a 5-year-old child, one year represents 20% of his life. A huge part of everything he knows, and that’s why the wait between two birthdays seems endless to him. But for a 40-year-old parent, that same year only represents 2.5% of their life, a much more insignificant portion. This principle does not only apply to parents, hence the universal adage according to which “life is short”.
Beyond the numbers, our biology is also responsible. In a study called Why our days seem shorter as we agephysicist Adrian Bejan explains that our minds measure time through a series of mental images. A young brain processes information much more quickly than an adult brain. It’s as if childhood were filmed in “slow motion” at 120 frames per second: each day is full of details, while adults instead film their lives in 24 frames per second. As we record less new footage at the same time, we have the impression that the film is speeding up.
A concept that neuroscience also confirms. Researcher David Eagleman has demonstrated that our brain measures time by the number of new memories created. Unlike childhood which is an uninterrupted series of “first times”, routine quickly takes over in adulthood. The brain automates the majority of daily tasks to save energy. When the adult looks back, he finds many fewer new striking memories and therefore concludes that “time flew by in the blink of an eye”.
Finally, beyond our internal perception, there is a very real societal factor. In his book Your children are not grown-upsclinical psychologist Béatrice Copper-Royer warns of the shortening of childhood. Early access to screens, the constant flow of information and our modern tendency to treat children like miniature adults disrupt their development. Little ones adopt adolescent codes earlier and earlier. Seeing an 8-year-old child mimic the attitudes of a 14-year-old, the parent’s feeling is confirmed: the time of carefree time is visibly shorter. Finally, if time flies so quickly alongside them, it is perhaps the best sign that it is time to slow down ours.
