As a mother of three and a university professor, I’ve spent years trying to balance my love for research and teaching technology with my love for my family. This New Year’s, my resolution is to better navigate the two.
One vacation a few years ago, I accidentally left my laptop at home. My 14-year-old daughter still talks about how that was the best vacation we ever had.
Whether writing papers, attending back-to-back meetings, debugging code, or answering late-night emails, it’s easy to lose track of the balance between work and home. For many in academia, blurred boundaries make it harder to be fully present for our families.
When I was studying computer science in graduate school, I was working late in the lab when a male lab mate said, “This is so much fun, I wish we could sleep here too.” While I loved the work, I knew I didn’t want to spend 24 hours in the lab. Even today, achieving a satisfying balance of work and family life, while striving for success in both, can be challenging.
For many women, trying to succeed in both professional and personal arenas can feel overwhelming. A recent Gallup report found that 51% of working women in the US feel stressed, compared to only 39% of men. Working mothers with children are twice as likely as working fathers to reduce work hours or leave their jobs. For many working women, and especially mothers, obtaining a work-life balance isn’t working.
A recent Conference Board survey found that “for the 6th year in a row, women are significantly less satisfied across almost all 26 job satisfaction components surveyed.” According to the study, “The largest gaps between men and women were related to wages, bonuses, potential for growth, health benefits (including mental health policies), and retirement plans.”
A recent study in Science of 245,270 tenure-track and tenured professors at United States–based PhD-granting departments demonstrates that attrition in academia is gendered, with women leaving their faculty jobs at higher rates than men. The study also reports that work-life balance challenges are particularly prominent among Assistant Professors. Another finding indicates that “faculty in non-STEM domains are at a higher risk of attrition than faculty in STEM domains.”
Yet, the STEM fields in academia are historically challenging for women faculty in hiring and leadership. The American Association of University Women (AAUW) reports that the gender gap is systemic, with women in the US comprising just 34 percent of the STEM workforce.
Contributing factors to these gaps, according to AAUW, are “gender stereotypes,” “male-dominated cultures,” and “fewer role models of women” in academia in STEM fields.
Professor Srabanti Chowdhury, an associate professor of Electrical Engineering at Stanford University, writes recently in Nature, that “the glaring underrepresentation of women in higher education did leave a lasting impression.” She adds, “Although balancing work and life is not strictly a gender-specific issue, it is important to acknowledge that women often encounter more social demanding pressures that can jeopardize their professional development.”
To be sure, administrators and managers must address and revise workplace policies and resources. Childcare policies and resources, compliance with the federal Family Medical Leave Act, and a supportive culture that encourages faculty to have a robust family life are essential. However, individuals can also take time to check in with colleagues and help create this culture of support.
Like designing software, trying to achieve a work-life balance will require constant iteration, testing, and refinement. This means gradually carving out more family time, limiting distractions from technology, and finding creative ways to connect.
My son and I once created a code word, JAR, a combination of our initials. If we said it to each other, we both had to stop what we were doing and simply be there for one another.
My husband, children, and I try to have dinner together most nights, where we often share our highs and lows, making time to celebrate the good and support each other through the challenges.
Over the years, I’ve tried to include my children in my research and teaching through “STEM time with Mommy,” where I introduce them to the concepts I teach my college students.
We’ve built and programmed robots, designed web pages, written programs in Scratch, and even crafted stories that teach coding through engaging narratives. They are my earliest testers on many of my research projects and biggest supporters–and sometimes critics.
I am still on the journey to find the right balance.
Achieving work-life balance may never be perfect, but remains an ongoing process of iteration and refinement—for women, mothers, and everyone.
In 2025, let’s commit to supporting ourselves and one another—at work and at home—for a happy new year.
About the Author: Dr. Rachel F. Adler is an Associate Professor in the School of Information Sciences at the University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign and a Public Voices Fellow through The OpEd Project.
