The young 27-year-old woman from Nardò, believed to be missing, but simply self-confined and hidden at a friend’s house, makes us think, as well as discuss.
In a world that searched for her for more than ten days using appeals and law enforcement, she had voluntarily taken refuge and hidden from everything and everyone. Having tens of thousands of followers, becoming a national case, making an entire nation talk about oneself: this type of voluntary disappearances were once the prerogative of teenagers. They disappeared and left their parents and the entire community they belonged to terrified and dismayed.
Adolescents sometimes demonstrate chaotic and disordered vital movements and running away from home is considered among the transgressions/problematic manifestations/risky behaviors that often characterize this age.
Young adults, on the other hand, use their condition of autonomy and self-determination to distance themselves from the family without the need to keep the adult world in suspense. You don’t want to stay in your parents’ house anymore? You use your self-determination and leave it. Even if they don’t agree.
There are many adults who have left their family of origin with a tear and without simulating a disappearance. In this specific case, what is striking is that the young woman found herself – when she disappeared – practically a short distance from her family’s home. It is striking that the world was looking for her everywhere while she was where she had always been. He had simply changed his protective role. No longer the mother and father, but the thirty-year-old friend. He does not appear to have done so to assert a right to unrequited love from his family. From what she revealed, it was understood that she was confused and disoriented. Perhaps a health problem has thrown his psychic functioning and awareness into haywire.
Tatiana Tramacere in a photo taken from Facebook
(HANDLE)
Today the stories of young adulthood are the most diverse. And of these differences, the case of the young woman from Nardò is a striking example. There are young men and women with a popularity of tens of thousands of followers, looked at and taken as a model through their digital identity, who in reality do not know how to orient themselves and find their own direction. They perceive only the virtual dimension of their existence, while they know little about the real. They move better within a social network rather than within the social context of reference. And everything becomes blurry.
The news told us of a pseudo-escape from home, which then transformed into a return to the family where everyone takes a breath because no one got hurt. We see parents happy for the return of their young adult son to the place of protection. But what should instead make us reflect is that at almost thirty years of age, some children become protagonists of news events only because they are frightened by their own lives that they do not know how to direct, inhabiting them with the same chaotic incoherence of a young teenager. They should be ready to occupy their active place in the world and instead they are specialists in virtual activities in the online world. So it can happen that their appearances in the real world turn into disappearances that force everyone to take care of them, feeling the need to protect them as if they were defenseless children, potentially threatened by the evil of the world. We feared that the 27-year-old girl had become a sort of contemporary Little Red Riding Hood intercepted by a big bad wolf in the dark woods of real life. Instead – and fortunately – there is only a disoriented young adult, protected by another naive young adult who has not realized that adulthood has very different rules from adolescent scripts. In the end all this turns into a boomerang: because right in the virtual space, a real adult world reappears which, without any empathy and compassion, turns your inadequacy into a target and overwhelms you with insults.
Of all this, I perceive that the word fragility today it is a word that covers our lives, both real and virtual, more than we ourselves are able to understand.
