The host Matthieu Delormeau experienced a long drug addiction and decided to highlight the dangers of such a practice in a book entitled “Addictions: “It was enough once…” He speaks for “Le Journal des Femmes”.
At 52, Matthieu Delormeau lays his cards on the table. Addicted to drugs, this notably caused him physical problems, to the point of losing vision in one eye. At the same time, his consumption also pushed him towards chemsex – a practice on the rise, particularly in gay circles – about which he agreed to tell us more. And to raise a cry of alarm when he is better now.
You have practiced chemsex (drug sex). What are its dangers and do you believe that those who practice it are sufficiently informed of its risks?
Matthew Delormeau. I would just like to tell people to never start. Because once you do it just a little bit, the addiction is direct. To give an image, it’s like when you go off-piste and the pleasure is increased tenfold. You know that one day you have the possibility of ending up in a crevasse or under an avalanche, but you continue. Chemsex is the same thing. Once you start, the sex is so much better and so great, that afterward, normal sex has no point. With normal sex, you no longer have a libido and your body can no longer cope. But even if it takes time, you have to stop. The brain is well made and it is a machine that will put itself back into place. Each day that passes is a day that brings you closer to victory.
When you manage to overcome the first addiction you have to fight a second one.
You have undergone several detoxification treatments during which you have taken very strong medications such as Valium. To treat an addiction we therefore expose ourselves to another addiction. What do you think of support in France?
I think other countries would have a lot to teach us. In the United States in particular, we offer many activities during treatment, such as horse therapy! In France, we prescribe medication and when we manage to overcome the first addiction we must combat a second one, namely that of medication. And it’s by far the worst!
In your book, you say that your addiction allowed you to know who your real friends were. Have you sorted?
Yes, but a little too much because the drug makes you very binary and categorical. I have turned my back on too many friends because let’s not forget that drugs, whether alcohol, cocaine or medication, are terribly isolating.
You also say that Cyril Hanouna was like a lifeline.
When I managed to overcome my addictions, my psychiatrist advised me to work again. But at that time everyone knew that I was sick, that I had been in police custody twice and no one wanted to bet on me. But Cyril Hanouna hired me and supported my request to W9 who obviously didn’t really want me. He told them he trusted me and he was the only one who reached out to me. If I’ve learned one thing with Cyril, it’s that when he promises something, he sticks to it.
I blocked and deleted all the dealers’ phone numbers
How are you doing today ?
Honestly good. I work, I have projects and it is, I can say it, the best year of my life. I am convinced that existence is made up of cycles: when you are at the top, you have to enjoy it but when you hit rock bottom, you have to tell yourself that if you really want it and give yourself the means, you will get back up. In my case, there was a before and an after. Going through this tunnel allowed me to become a better person, to become someone else and to learn to love myself. Despite everything, I know that I still have a sword of Damocles hanging over my head. This is also why I changed my phone and blocked and deleted all the phone numbers of the dealers with whom I was in contact.
