Lending money to a friend, a brother, an ex-spouse or a parent is often an emotional reflex rather than a legal reflex. As long as everything goes well, trust is enough. But as soon as the deadline slips away, the promises are repeated or the debtor turns away, the lender discovers that a service provided can be expensive: several thousand euros, and sometimes a lastingly damaged relationship.
In this moment of change, it all depends on the method. We must relaunch without humiliating, formalize without overplaying the threat, then know when to move from the friendly register to the legal field. Because when it comes to lending between individuals, the question is not only whether we are right, but if we can prove it. And act before it’s too late. Maître Benjamin Boulard, lawyer at the Paris Court of Appeal, recalls thata well-written acknowledgment of debt remains the best insurance, both to preserve the relationship and to defend your claim.
Get out of the vagueness, quickly and in writing
When a loved one is slow to repay, the first emergency is to leave the field of vague exchanges. Vague SMS messages, oral promises and successive postponements weaken the lender. Gold, “beyond 1,500 euros, writing is in principle required”recalls Master Benjamin Boulard. A well-made acknowledgment of debt must at least mention the identity of the parties, the amount, the date and the signature of the debtor. In the event of non-payment, this formalization changes the balance of power: “the well-written acknowledgment of debt is an essential instrument”because it facilitates proof of the loan and remittance of funds.
Start amicably before going to court
Before going to litigation, the most skillful approach often remains a sober and factual written reminder. Then, if nothing changes, a formal notice. The idea is to remind you of the amount due, the due date and to leave a final exit, for example with a timetable. If the blockage persists, then legal action must be taken. “The acknowledgment of debt under private signature is not an enforceable titlewarns Master Benjamin Boulard. It therefore does not allow, in itself, to carry out a seizure-attribution or a seizure-sale”. The creditor must refer the matter to the judge, in particular via an order for payment or a summons on the merits.
The real risk: waiting until the prescription
Many lenders procrastinate so as not to ruin the friendship, then let time slip away. This is often the most costly mistake. “The debt established by an acknowledgment of debt is in principle subject to a limitation period of 5 years”recalls the lawyer. After this period, the action may end.
But everything is not set in stone: “any subsequent recognition (express or tacit, even addressed to a third party) interrupts the limitation period and causes a new period to begin”, specifies Master Benjamin Boulard. In other words, a message, a payment commitment or the start of repayment can give the creditor time. Provided you keep proof of it.


