Why do fathers constantly ask questions to which they already have the answer in front of them? This annoying habit, which pushes mothers to the limit on a daily basis, has an unexpected name which perfectly sums up the situation.
You must have noticed: most dads know nothing about their children’s lives, or rather about the organization inherent in parenthood. At least, they rarely make the effort to think about it. One of two things: either they don’t even ask the question, or they refer to their partner for any information that they should logically know.
“When is his vacation?”, “What’s his clothing size again?”, “What’s his best friend’s name again?”or even worse, “What’s this weekend?” All mothers are confronted daily with these types of questions from their partner who relies on the one who manages everything, all the time, as if she were becoming their personalized agenda. However, fathers know… but it’s quicker to ask the question to someone who is used to it. “My husband doesn’t even ask himself the question of knowing what time our son should go to bed, if he has had his bath, if he needs to buy more diapers, or if he has an appointment with the pediatrician… He knows that I will take care of it, so he doesn’t even worry about it”Delphine confides to us bitterly. This unfortunate reflex is nothing new, but until now we didn’t know that it had a name. And that explains everything.
On social networks, a new expression has appeared: “finger princess. Originally, this word from South Korea refers to a person in a group conversation, who asks questions that they could easily answer on their own. The “finger princess” asks thus “What time do we meet?“, while the answer is a few messages above. As their name suggests, this person is too lazy to lift their finger and scroll through the discussion to find the information they are looking for. And that sums up very well what dads do in everyday life: they take their spouse for a real search engine who has parental science infused. Because in addition to asking them more than basic questions, they also don’t take the trouble to answer their children’s equally banal questions : “Is there any milk left?”, “I don’t know, ask mom”.
Besides, it’s not even specific to dads… it seems specific to men at all: asking their partner, their mother, their daughter, or even their sister will always be simpler than going to find the answer themselves. “My father was incapable of remembering the names of my friends, or even the name of the school in which I did my higher education… which he nevertheless helped me pay for! Even today, when he is looking for something at home, he systematically asks my mother. Or worse, if she is not there, he asks me even though I have not lived with them for years”thus illustrates Estelle, 27 years old.
We could find hundreds of examples of these everyday situations which, taken together, are largely responsible for the mental burden that weighs on all women, mothers or not. One thing is certain: behind every “ask your mother” there is a potential “finger princess” who is unaware of herself. And maybe it’s time to hold up a mirror to him rather than giving him the answer.
